When you decide to pursue pregnancy as a solo mom by choice, one of the first clinical decisions you'll face is whether to start with IUI or go straight to IVF. Both are well-established paths, but they differ significantly in process, cost, success rates, and what they ask of your body.
Here's a clear comparison to help you have an informed conversation with your reproductive endocrinologist.
IUI: The Basics
IUI stands for intrauterine insemination. It's a relatively simple procedure where washed donor sperm is placed directly into your uterus around the time of ovulation.
The process:
- You may take oral medications (like Clomid or letrozole) to stimulate ovulation, or do a natural (unmedicated) cycle
- Your doctor monitors your cycle with ultrasounds and bloodwork
- When you're about to ovulate, the sperm is inserted through a thin catheter
- The whole procedure takes about 5 to 10 minutes
Success rates (per cycle):
- Under 35: approximately 15 to 20%
- 35 to 37: approximately 10 to 15%
- 38 to 40: approximately 8 to 12%
- Over 40: approximately 5 to 8%
These rates are per cycle, so most doctors recommend trying 3 to 6 IUI cycles before considering IVF.
Cost per cycle: $500 to $2,000 (plus $300 to $1,200 for donor sperm per vial)
IVF: The Basics
IVF stands for in vitro fertilization. It's a more involved process where your eggs are retrieved, fertilized with donor sperm in a lab, and the resulting embryo is transferred to your uterus.
The process:
- 10 to 14 days of injectable hormone medications to stimulate your ovaries
- Frequent monitoring appointments (every 2 to 3 days)
- Egg retrieval under sedation
- Fertilization and embryo culture in the lab (3 to 5 days)
- Embryo transfer (fresh or frozen)
For a detailed walkthrough, see our complete egg freezing guide, which covers the stimulation and retrieval process in depth.
Success rates (per cycle):
- Under 35: approximately 46 to 50% live birth rate per retrieval
- 35 to 37: approximately 35 to 40%
- 38 to 40: approximately 23 to 27%
- 41 to 42: approximately 12 to 15%
Cost per cycle: $10,000 to $20,000 (including medications)
Side-by-Side Comparison
| Factor | IUI | IVF |
|---|---|---|
| Invasiveness | Minimal | Moderate |
| Medications | Oral or none | Injectable hormones |
| Monitoring | Light | Intensive |
| Procedure time | 5-10 minutes | 15-20 minutes (retrieval) |
| Recovery | None | 1-3 days |
| Cost per cycle | $800-3,200 | $10,000-20,000 |
| Success rate (under 35) | 15-20% | 46-50% |
| Cumulative success (3 cycles) | ~40-50% | ~70-80% |
When Doctors Recommend IUI First
IUI is typically the starting point if:
- You're under 35 with no known fertility issues
- Your AMH and FSH levels are normal
- Your fallopian tubes are open (confirmed by HSG test)
- You want to start with a less invasive, lower-cost option
Many solo moms start with IUI because it's simpler, cheaper, and has a reasonable cumulative success rate over multiple cycles.
When Doctors Recommend Going Straight to IVF
IVF may be recommended first if:
- You're over 38 (where time and egg quality become more pressing)
- You have low AMH or diminished ovarian reserve
- You have blocked fallopian tubes or endometriosis
- You want to do preimplantation genetic testing (PGT) on embryos
- Previous IUI cycles have been unsuccessful
The Financial Calculation
For solo moms, the financial math matters. Three IUI cycles at roughly $1,500 each (plus sperm) costs around $6,000 to $8,000 total. If those don't work and you move to IVF, you've spent that money plus the IVF cost.
Some women over 35 choose to go directly to IVF because the higher per-cycle success rate can actually be more cost-effective in the long run. This is a conversation worth having with your doctor based on your specific fertility test results.
The Emotional Consideration
IUI cycles are emotionally lighter but can become draining over multiple unsuccessful attempts. IVF is more emotionally intense but often resolves faster because of higher success rates.
Neither path is easy. Both deserve respect. And both can lead to the same beautiful outcome.
The Bottom Line
There is no universally "right" choice between IUI and IVF. The best path depends on your age, fertility profile, budget, and personal preferences. What matters most is that you understand your options and make an informed decision with a doctor you trust.
Want help thinking through which path might be right for you? Book a session with me to talk through your options.